This is for: people blocking out all the noise for their dream come true. Where anything not contributing to their final goal is a distraction. You’re clouded with guilt or drought when you aren’t focused on the mission.

For those new to the real world, we often get too caught up in ourselves. In the past five years since college, through a pandemic, building my office, and starting life with minimal support (I can’t rely on family for serious financial help), I’ve learned I messed up by:

1. Not being patient with myself.
2. Not achieving true peace.
3. Not being true to myself because I’m not yet who I want to be.

I don’t want to rewind time, but I wish I had someone who understood me. This website, for instance, was a small effort on my end. It wasn’t supposed to happen until my office was ready.

I recently decided to postpone that part of my plan because it’s too damn cold. Today, I decided to let go until March. Afterwards, I’ve already finished a family friend’s website, started this one, hit the gym, followed my self-care routine, and am excited to work on time tomorrow, all in one day.

I realized that my attachment to making an office space is as bad as a regular person’s longings or quick happy fixes like doom-scrolling, getting high, eating shitty food, a sexual climax or the longing of someone you miss in bed that moved on years ago.

Lately, I’ve been trying to take control of my life, making decisions I want to with what I have.

That feeling didn’t come from enduring some phase or program in life for a good ending. I realized I’m happiest when I’m truly independent, not focused on a future calendar date to continue the next part of my life.

This epiphany is about detaching from waiting for everything to fall into place.

For the things I can’t do because of a minor blockade like this cold weather, I just breakup with that part of me until I can actually make amends.

• Going to the gym and working on my body.
• Starting this website to help first-gen kids and others without guidance.
• Working on music I create.
• Focusing on my work ethics.

I’ve finally broken up with waiting for the next page of my life, and it’s fucking liberating.

ULTIMATE LESSON:

I am a million times happier in 24 hours because I decided to no longer be attached to the things I have to wait for. Leaving behind me having to wait on this office space to finish so I can keep on being me has done damage to me for quite literally years, as I believed I needed to pass that hurdle to continue on building the foundations it takes to become the version of my ultimate self.

Therefore, I invite anyone reading this to do the following:
If you’re waiting for something to happen before you start living your life the way you want, stop waiting. Don’t let anything or anyone, whether it’s a person, a place, or an event, hold you back from being the person you’re working to become. You don’t need to wait for a specific moment to be who you are.

How to do so:
1) Think of the person you are working on to become.

2) Think of the things you are waiting on to become that person

3) Immediately breakup with it. No second chance, no back of my mind, drop the entire shit, then focus on the things you can work on now.
For example, that office space is still gonna be something I am looking forward to, but it isn’t going to be the thing I am waiting on to become me 🙂